


Triggering the Katie Cassidy fanatics

by Aragorn_II_Elessar



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), Deadpool - All Media Types
Genre: Author has unleashed his inner Nicolas Cage, Crack, Don't Like Don't Read, Fanatics suck, Gen, Humor, Not for Laurel fanatics, Wade Wilson is awesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2020-10-12 12:49:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20564615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aragorn_II_Elessar/pseuds/Aragorn_II_Elessar
Summary: The author has figured out the most merciless way to trigger the Katie Cassidy fanatics who bully fanfic authors for pairing Oliver with Sara, Nyssa or Kara instead of Laurel.





	Triggering the Katie Cassidy fanatics

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Bl4ckHunter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bl4ckHunter/gifts), [Phillipe363](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phillipe363/gifts), [Stand_with_Ward_and_Queen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stand_with_Ward_and_Queen/gifts).

> Disclaimer: I do not own Deadpool or anything else you may recognize
> 
> These Laurel fanatics are actually KC fanatics because they keep bad-mouthing Caity Lotz and Juliana Harkavy, even though Sara and Season 5 Dinah are far more accurate depictions of Black Canary in Arrow than either of the two Laurels (and I like both of them).
> 
> And now I have figured out the best, most merciless way to trigger them all, with some help from Only reviewer. So thank you to him.
> 
> Hope everyone enjoys.

Three Katie Cassidy fanatics woke up in a room with a groan. Two of them were guys and one was a girl. The last thing they remembered was harassing a bunch of authors on their laptop in their basement as they had no other life. They saw a door and tried to open it but it wouldn't budge.

In front of them was a TV screen. It suddenly came on and Wade Wilson appeared on it.

"Hey fanatics!" Wade said, "You made Stand with Ward and Queen and Phillipe363 enact a 'scorched earth' policy. You made Aragorn II Elessar edit his stories. And Bl4ckHunter also won't write Lauriver stuff outside of his series. Hope you're proud of yourself."

"They deserve it!" The girl spoke up, "They are two-faced sneaks! All of them! They write Lauriver, and then they go and write Canarrow, Olyssa and Kariver!"

"Who does that?" Another one spoke, "I mean, why can't they just focus on the best pairing ever? Huh?"

Wade laughed hysterically and said, "Let me make something clear to you for them- they are not on payroll, and you're not their paying clients. There is no contract that they have to write for only one ship. They can write for any ship they want. Now of course, Aragorn personally knows someone who cannot ship more than one pairing, but even that person understands the concept of multi-shipping. So they can ship any pairing they want and write for whatever pairing they want. The fact that you have to harass them for not writing a pairing you like proves you're all entitled jerks whose parents never corrected their behavior and gave them everything they asked for. Well, the world doesn't work like that. The fact that you have to bully authors who entertain others with their stories for FREE makes it clear that you are unable to appreciate their goodness, which makes you unworthy of such entertainment!"

"Yeah, yeah, same old crap. Got anything new?" The third fanatic asked.

"Well, Aragorn is the most vindictive person I have met in my life." Wade said, "And now, with help from Only reviewer, he has discovered the best, most merciless way to trigger you lot."

And then suddenly all 3 of them ended up on the couch in front of the TV and no matter how hard they tried, they couldn't move. Wade disappeared from the TV and in its place appeared a movie scene.

The movie was none other than 'The Scribbler.' And the scene was a sex scene of Katie Cassidy. That made the fanatics very happy. Even the girl.

The two guys started jerking off to the sex scene, their jaws agape at their idol Katie's features. But the scene was pretty short and it ended. It was replaced by another scene.

"What?" One of the guy fanatics asked angrily as they had to cover up their pants with the pillows on the couches in embarrassment.

In this scene, Katie Cassidy, wearing a white shirt, looked around at the wind blowing in fear before walking up to her car. She fumbled for her leys before accidentally dropping them under the car.

"Shit!" A guy fanatic said in horror.

She knelt down and started looking for them as a sound came from the bushes while the girl fanatic was muttering, "Get out, get out…."

She found the keys eventually and got into the car as the three sighed in relief. She then tried to start it but it didn't and the three started shivering in fear until it did start.

"Finally!" The girl fanatic said as Katie Cassidy started backing the car but saw a branch was in the way so she had to stop. She saw the wind blowing around her and it looked pretty scary.

"Please stay in the car!" A guy fanatic said.

But then she unlocked her car and getting out, tried to lift the branch.

"Lift it! Lift it!" The other guy fanatic said when the screen ran into Katie and the scene was cut as the three yelled in despair, "What's happening? What's happening?"

And then the scene changed to a brunette girl with a red shirt cautiously opening the door to the bathroom. The shower was on and she removed the curtain, only to see it was empty. She got a call from an unknown caller and picking it up, told him to stop calling. But it was the police who told her the call was coming from inside the house, terrifying her.

As she cut it, she heard a cell phone ring and turning to the direction, saw Katie Cassidy's character lying dead, her eyes staring without seeing and screamed in terror.

The three fanatics screamed in horror and despair as well and started crying, "NOOOOO! NOT KATIE CASSIDY! NOOOOOOO!"

The scene then changed again.

This time, Liam Neeson was opening up a bunch of doors to see dead or knocked out girls. He opened another door and saw Katie Cassidy's character lying on the bed, her hand cuffed to it. Her eyes were wide open, staring without seeing. He walked closer and checked her pulse. There was none. There were holes in her arm and a needle was lying on the ground.

"NOOOOOOO! KC! NOOOOOOOOO!" The fanatics screamed in horror, terror and despair again on seeing Katie Cassidy's character die.

Then the scene changed and this time, Katie Cassidy's character was running in a forested area in a wedding dress. She eventually stumbled into a guy and hugged him in relief.

"Phew! She escaped this one!" A guy fanatic said.

As they talked, the guy suddenly revealed he was the accomplice of some killer known as 'Wakefield.' She was horrified. He tried to hug her but she pulled away and fell down. He then grabbed her by the hair and picked her up as she realized he had killed her father and he said he didn't want this to happen on their wedding night.

"SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!" The fanatics were screaming in horror.

She started hitting him but he grabbed her and stabbed her in the abdomen and said how it wasn't fair before driving the knife deeper.

"NO! IT IS NOT FAIR! WHY DOES KATIE CASSIDY ALWAYS HAVE TO DIE IN EVERYTHING?!" The fanatics screamed again in despair and horror with tears in their eyes as Katie had died again.

He lowered her to the ground as her eyes rolled back and her hand lowered on the ground. He retracted his bloodied knife.

"NO! WHY?! WHY?!" The fanatics cried.

And then Wade Wilson appeared on the screen again, "Enjoying so far?"

"Why're you doing this?!" A guy fanatic roared, "Why?"

"Looks like Aragorn was right. This is triggering you all a lot." Wade said.

"You watched all of her movies and shows just to see if she dies or not?" The girl fanatic asked.

"No. Me and Aragorn are just thankful to the kind soul who made the Cinemorgue wiki. Just had to look up all of her deaths and find them on YouTube." Wade said as they continued crying, "The only movie we have seen out of all those we showed you was Taken, which is a great movie because of Liam Neeson being a badass. And now- the big one is coming! ENJOY!"

The scene changed again as the fanatics cried out in despair and tears fell out.

This time, Katie Cassidy's character was sleeping with her boyfriend when she heard her dog barking so she went out to tell him to come inside. But the barks turned into whimpers and then there was no sound.

She walked up to his dog house and her eyes widened in horror to see her dog lying in a pool of blood. And then a burnt man in a hat wearing a burnt fedora and razor sharp knives instead of fingernails appeared. Freddy Krueger! "I was just petting him." He said before laughing maniacally as she screamed in horror and ran inside.

"SHIT! FREDDY! OH NO! FREDDY IS AFTER KC! WHAT SHOULD WE DO?!" The fanatics screamed in terror again as their hearts beat against their chests.

She looked around as a shadow passed and she gasped, just like the fanatics. Then a younger version of her character arrived and led her inside as she saw girls jumping on a skipping rope while the '1-2' song was sung.

Suddenly, Freddy appeared and completed the verse. But then she woke up and gasped. She tried to wake her boyfriend but he didn't get up.

"Phew! She is awake now! He can't get her! The fanatics said.

She walked in to the bathroom and washed her face before wiping it clean with her towel. She then walked back into the bedroom and smiled. She then lied down again but instead of her boyfriend, Freddy Krueger was next to her. "Found you." He said as she started screaming in horror.

"NOOOOOOOOO! PLEEEASE! NOOOOO! STOP THIIIIIIIS!" The fanatics screamed again.

Her boyfriend woke up from her screams and tried to wake her but she didn't as she was sent into the air and crashed against the ceiling and walls, breaking her bones as he watched in horror while the fanatics screamed, "NOOOO! PLEASE! DON'T KILL KC!"

Then she was slashed across the chest by Freddy's claws as blood splattered everywhere, including the face of her boyfriend as she fell on the bed and the entirety of it was covered in her blood.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WHYYYYYYYYYY!" The fanatics continued screaming and crying. This death of Katie Cassidy had scarred them emotionally for life. It would continue to haunt them till their deaths. Which was near.

The door was kicked open and in walked a medium sized, decently good looking man.

"Who're you?" The girl fanatic asked.

The man suddenly screamed like a DBZ character undergoing a transformation and in his place now stood Nicolas Cage dressed as a priest.

Hallelujah played in the background as Cage clapped his hands and twirled his head around while the three watched with an agape jaw. He then walked up behind the girl fanatic and as the Hallelujah song continued, he also sang, "Hallelujah! Hallelujah!"

And then he grabbed her shoulders and his face turned to one of arousal.

He then walked up in front of the three and taking out a gun, aimed at them.

"You're going to kill us? Just do it!" A guy fanatic said, "We have no reason to live anymore. Katie Cassidy keeps dying."

"I'm not just going to kill you. I'm going to take your….." He put a hand on his face, "Face….." He then removed the hand swiftly, "Off!"

"Oh God! No!" The fanatics begged in terror but Cage laughed a hysterical Nicolas Cage laugh and shot them in their throats, killing them all. He then started taking their faces off as Wade said in his room, "I'm so glad Aragorn replaced Bieber with his own inner Nicolas Cage."

Suddenly, Cage arrived there and said, "TEMPORARILY WADE! CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND?! I MEAN- CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND BASIC ALPHABETS?! LIKE, A-B-C-D-E-F-G-"

"Nicola-"

"H-I—" Cage clapped his hands hysterically, "J-K-L-M-N-O-P-"

"Cag-"

Waving his hands around hysterically, Cage roared, "Q-R-S-T-U-V-WXYZ! HUH!"

Folding his arms, Cage said, "I NEVER MISREAD ANY ALPHABET!"

"Good, so you know your alphabets." Wade said before throwing a flashbang grenade to the ground and disappearing.

Nicolas ran around yelling, "I'M A VAMPIRE! I'M A VAMPIRE!"

Wade ran off and said, "Man, this is even worse than Bieber."

**Author's Note:**

> And done. The best way to trigger KC fanatics is to show them all of her deaths outside of Arrow. Now personally I have only seen Taken (great movie) and Nightmare on Elm Street (terrible remake of a masterpiece), but I looked up all of her deaths for this one-shot. Hope you all enjoyed. And I heard of The Scribbler 2 years ago. I have never seen it but I heard KC got a sex scene in it. I'm sure her fanatics would enjoy.
> 
> The movies were, in order- When A Stranger Calls (2006), Taken (2008), Harper's Island (TV Series from 2009 and the episode was 1x12) and A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010).
> 
> Hope you enjoyed the reference to Face/Off
> 
> Hope everyone enjoyed.


End file.
